I went to the local college yesterday and applied for admission. If my transcripts from the college I went to when I was younger and the high school I graduated from get back to admissions before August 19 2015 I will go back to college. I entitled this post “Back To My Future because that is exactly what I am doing by returning to college. I will be forty-eight years old on August 16th 2014 and I wanted to have my college credentials a long time ago, but that was not to be. Now I am going back to that future I had imagined for myself.
It scares me and intimidates me a little but that will not stop me from getting to my goal. When I was in High School all I wanted to be was a Mother, but my test scores were so high I was made to take “college bound” classes. When really I wanted to take Home Economics and Sewing Class, but that was not to be. I married early and went around the world with my husband who was a sergeant in the Army. Unfortunately infertility stopped me from my goal of becoming a Mother for fifteen years. And then all of a sudden I got pregnant for the fourth time except this time I did not miscarry in the first trimester I had a beautiful daughter and I felt like I had finally reached an unattainable goal!
When she turned two I put her in Preschool because she was very intelligent and I wanted her to be able to soak up every bit of knowledge that the Pre-school could provide. We even had to buy her books for her class. So I decided well I have met the goal of becoming a Mother and she is all set to go to school so I should go back myself. I was fortunate to get into a program that its main goal was to put Mothers back in the workforce. I had a free ride to college. And I took advantage of it until my husband got the perfect job but in another state! He kept telling me he was sure that state would have the same program and I would be able to continue my education. But it did not work like that. The new state based its program off the household income the one I had left had based it on the fact I had been out of the workforce for seventeen years. My husband’s income disqualified me.
I went back to being my daughters teacher because we were in a new place and I knew nothing about the preschools in the area. Yes I was over protective. So I taught her at home and when she entered school she got a little bored and impatient because she had already learned what the teacher was teaching and she wanted to be challenged. So I had to do the challenging at home. She was an avid reader and read her first book by the age of two. I felt pretty successful as a Mother.
Then I became ill and I left my husband but we shared custody of our daughter. So everyday since we only lived a mile apart she saw both her parents and every night we said bedtime prayers using the speaker on our phones and her Daddy would pray for our family and friends and others that had been laid on our hearts. My estranged husband was my best friend and hugest supporter. It has been eight years since we separated and our daughter is now fifteen. In January God laid it on my heart that I needed to go home to my husband. He had never even dated in those eight years. What he had done was to shut down his heart except for his love for our daughter. But two months ago I asked him if he wanted to try to work things out and get back together and he said yes but he was not able to just open up and trust me again that it would take time. We start marriage counseling this month.
In February of 2013 I wrote a book on an old computer that I had to keep plugged up by the power cord because its battery had gone bad. It took me three months but I wrote my first book “Scar Wars-Forged In Fright” then I just put the computer away until May of this year. I had to do some rewrites and some editing but it was an outstanding book. I got excited and got a publisher and my second goal was met “Scar Wars-Forged In Fright” will be released January 3, 2015.
I am disabled due to Mental Illness. But my intellect is still intact. So since my disability leaves me with a lot of time on my hands and my daughter is a self sufficient teenager I decided to write another book. When the book was finished I wanted to delve into the art of writing, journalism, and the arts so I decided I would go back to my future and go to college. So yesterday I applied and if my transcripts arrive in time I will be pursuing An Associates Degree In Liberal Arts, in the fall semester. But I will not give up going back to college! If my transcripts arrive too late for the fall Semester the very next semester I will be sitting in a classroom.
So why tell all of you about this? Because I want all the people that this post can reach to know it is never to late to “go back to the future”. Set a new goal for your life. You may not want to go back to college but take those line dancing lessons or be a volunteer for a non- profit organization. Every time you choose a new goal to obtain you are furthering your future. Look ahead not back! Be brave! I am embarking on my journey with a disability but I will not let it disable me anymore.
To All Who Will Hear,